It's been way too long to even apologize. I'm not even going to make excuses. I have had two more children since the last time I wrote a blog. Kolby is 6, Meela will be 2 on Sunday and Judah turned 1 last month, busy is an understatement. We are always on the move. I am learning to find beauty in the mundane (thanks Dori.) We decided that I would be with the kids the majority of the time. They are only this small for a short amount of time. The kids are amazing little people that can make me feel a vast amount of emotions in a short span of time.. I am extremely thankful for them. It is an amazing feeling to watch them grow and watch their distinct personalities develop. I am along for their journey, it is a roller coaster. A roller coaster I wouldn't trade for the world. There are many nights Brandon and I pass out from exhaustion. Exhaustion from work and day to day things. Then there are beautiful nights such as these that I am up and the house is quite. I hear my husband snoring and my children breathing and tossing in their sleep. Sometimes I watch tv, other times I just stare at the wall and think, other nights I pray.There are days I feel like I am in adequate, like I am not doing ANYTHING. Brandon has to remind me just how important my job is. My 6 year old is going through a bit of a rough patch. She's going through this mouthy, eye rolling, stubborn as a mule with an attitude to match phase. It drives me up the wall. And I'm like what the heck am I doing wrong? The answer is nothing. She is a little person testing the limits, trying to figure things out, I am in no way saying what is going on is OK, but it's a phase. We're trying to navigate through it together with conversation and tons of prayer. She was off for spring break this week (I know super late for Spring break) and we had such a great time together. She does way better when the 5 of us are together for an extended amount of time. This week I watched her guide her brother around things, played Barbies with Meela. I was just amazed at how big she is getting and how fast it happened. I watched her love on her brother and sister, even though sometimes those moments were short lived and followed shortly by one or both of them screaming mom to tell on the other one. Those moments in between are beautiful. I want to capture it all, but sometimes in trying to capture it all you miss IT, whatever IT may be.
Meela is in her "terrible twos" phase. Maybe because I anticipated it, it doesn't seem so bad. First she's sour then she's sweet, no but seriously that's her. She's so silly and strong willed, but so sweet sometimes all at once.Brandon was just telling me how he looks at her in the middle of their conversations like I am sitting here having a whole conversation with my two year old. A full blown conversation where she is making gestures, faces and stringing words together so easily now. She loves her big sister and wants to do what she does, of course she cannot do everything her big sister does as she is 4 years older than Meela. Meela and Judah have a special language they look at each other every morning at some point stop what they're doing and make each other smile and then laugh. Meela loves snuggling with her big sister while they're watching movies, which is something Meela just started doing recently.
Judah man. Happiest toddler I have ever met. He is always smiling and laughing, so so so goofy. I have quickly learned the difference between little boys and girls. We had to buy a baby gate for the steps; he climbs on EVERYTHING. Slides off of things with his had stretched out head first, ready for the world. Judah gets into anything and everything. We have this bucket full of balls that the girls rarely played with. Thanks to Judah they are all over the house EVERYDAY. Everything that is round is automatically a ball. I had to explain to him many times today that my melons that he was rolling all around my kitchen were in fact fruit and not balls. He looked at me and pointed at the melons saying "Ball." I would say, "No." He would just smile or laugh. The way his sisters love on him is a sight of beauty.
They all add something special to our family. Thank you husband for helping to make this all possible, without him there would be no this.We have gained friends, lost friends have estranged friends. We're just trying to navigate through this the best way we can. I am just so thankful that I have a great husband, we do this together, giving 100% of ourselves. We have to our kids are watching. We get through it together by communicating and praying. Praying helps so much, the secret is to not stop praying once things are good, continue on through the good.
Psalms 127:3-5
Lo, children are the heritage of the Lord and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.
Just wanted to share some of me
Enjoy
